My #1 wisdom on anger

💫 Letters | Holistika Embodiment

For all things mind, body, soul, and spirituality

I know how it’s like to feel bad about feeling and showing anger.

Especially feeling scared when my own anger would show up.

When you are doing the deeper work, anger will visit sooner or later.

When it does messages that you grew up hearing:

“Your are too sensitive”.

“Don’t take it personal”.

“You don’t know how to control your emotions”

You use your mighty force to contain it.

But guess what?

You don’t have to because it’s already being contained by quickly moving on to the next thing.

This containment is so harmful, but it’s not your fault. This is what you grew up learning as a good son/daughter does - to keep the peace.

Until one day, you loose your shit, cause you can’t take it anymore.

The guilt sets in, the spiral begins, and it’s scary. So you cope, to once again, “contain it”.

Here’s the thing: learning to have a relationship with the angry part, takes time, and it’s a slow process, if you want it to stop or decrease the feeling of overwhelm by what activates the anger and how it feels inside.

The relationship begins now because its for your own good health.

Suppressing anger and/or acting out in anger, it’s like adding fuel to the fire of toxicity that we are all already exposed to in our environment.

If we don’t do our part to have a healthy relationship with anger (aka healthy aggression), our bodies will succumb to fighting its self inside (e.g. disease, autoimmune, diabetes, cancer, etc.).

Begin to befriend that self protection fight response of your autonomic nervous system.

When anger is present, it means that your body wanted to use the charge of energy inside you (caused by hormones like adrenaline and cortisol) to fight off the perceived threat, but it never got a chance.

It means that the boundaries of your nervous system to manage the overwhelm of input (aka threat) is too much, and it’s asking you to mobilize and fight off by yell, kicking, spitting, bitting, growling, pushing.

But that energy is stuck in your tissues and cells.

And your positive affirmations are getting in the way of it moving organically and on it’s own time, and dissipate.

So, my invitation to you is to feel your anger and say “hello” to it.

Validate it.

Don’t keep ruminating about what the other person did to you - cause that makes it worse, trust me - but put a hand over your heart if it’s racing.

Slowly move the parts of the body feeling tense.

Push against a wall slowly to move a bit of the anger.

And don’t expect that those practices will take away the anger, but you will be better able to be with it.

✌️ 🫶 ,

Albania

P.S. If you have any questions or would like to work with me, reply to this letter, and I’d be happy to connect.

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